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‘A chaotic mess’: Vietnam Veterans reflect on war after 50 years

HUNTSVILLE, Ala. (WHNT) — Healing comes in all forms, at all different times. For some Vietnam veterans, 50 years is not long enough to fully heal from what they experienced.

The Vietnam War is one of the most controversial conflicts in American history, and the pain it caused is still raw 50 years after it ended. While time helps to heal wounds, that war still haunts many who served in it.

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“It’s taken me almost 50 years to get through some of my traumas,” Allen Farley, a Marine Corp. Vietnam veteran, said. “You’re standing next to somebody and they get killed and you’re still standing there, you know. Why?”

“I went all this time not even knowing I had PTSD or thinking I had PTSD,” Wayne Harlan, a Navy Vietnam Veteran, said. “Then, all of a sudden, I can’t sleep at night. I have nightmares.”

In an effort to gain healing and peace, several veterans traveled to Vietnam for the 50th anniversary to visit sites where they fought. For others, the mere thought of going back is deeply troubling.

“The job was you get up, strap it on, go find something to kill every day,” Army Vietnam Veteran John Chancellor said. “And I don’t need to go back there.”

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“Seeing those veterans going back to Vietnam, I don’t think I could ever do that,” Farley said. I lost way too many people over there.”

But recalling their returns home is not pleasant either.

“And then you’d go change our uniform into civilian clothes so you wouldn’t get spit on,” Harlan said.

“I had my uniform on,” Farley said. “This guy came up behind me, punched me in the kidneys, and then ran.”

Despite the great losses, significant sacrifices, and disturbing memories, all three veterans said they would do it again. They noted their honor and pride to serve a country they love so deeply.

“My job was to take care of the guys on the ground,” Chancellor said. “Whatever it took. And it didn’t matter who they were. They were American.”